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Instead of cheering in victory that he's defeated his murdering, abusive robo-stalker, Tony begs the armor to live, tells it he wants to get inside it and desperately tries to fix it. Since original Wolverine is already basically a gritty reboot of the concept of grittiness, he is basically the exact same character. It's legal in that universe. You can create an infograpic and you could be on the front page of Cracked. But they don't just leave a short hypnotic message in the kid -- they full on condition him to be their love slave, making him practice proposing to them, kissing them on the cheek and feeling like he genuinely loves them. Things don't go well, as the armor kicks his ass since it feels cheated on by Tony wearing any other armor. In short, Batman and Superman were being so lame that aliens from another planet came just to stop them, and we thank them for it. Easily the creepiest, most disturbing plan they ever had was to brainwash Superman into loving them, as a baby. A few hours later, Lois finds Superbaby on the street and assumes Superman has gotten himself stuck in child form. Or at least we could have assumed that up until this point, where it seems as though Tony might actually, kind of, sort of love the armor back.

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Description: Tony Stark, billionaire playboy and part-time advanced technology hoarder, has been in a lot of relationships throughout the course of his comic book, dating or nailing every female character who crossed his path. Now it's not made clear just how specific this message was, so the only theories we have about the whole thing are that Scott was mind-controlled into the kiss and Emma was simply OK with getting down and dirty while surrounded by the dead bodies of people she knows, or that Jean found the afterlife a little boring and wanted a show for herself and the other ghosts hanging around watching and perpetrated the whole thing. It is at this point that Tony becomes infinitely grateful that he never built Iron Man an Iron-dick, or he would undoubtedly be getting his ass Iron-raped any minute now. During the middle of Nightcrawler's hell-trial, his adopted sister Jimaine, who we assume must have just been taking a casual stroll through hell at the time and came to see what was going on, appears in Kurt's defense. This happened in the official DC universe. Jean is even shown the exact moment that Scott gave up. Add me to the daily newsletter. The future Jean sees is a grim, post-apocalyptic wasteland, and she discovers that the reason the world fell apart is because Cyclops couldn't man up after her death and get his shit together long enough to lead the team and save the day. Hal explains to her that even if this was OK which it's not. But maybe we can give him the benefit of the doubt. And these are high school girls. She apologizes to her cousin for meddling, and we then learn the creepy truth -- that Superman isn't as opposed to marriage as he previously said, it's just that he totally, definitely wants to marry his cousin. Man what an unsophisticated computer. The manipulative, rapey nature of this whole plan is almost too much to believe.
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